Sarge's Journal
Overyou 19 Oct 2007
Impressive, not only does your poetry touch one's heart but also makes me somehow happy ( I could even say proud ) to understand English ^^
Sgt. Nuker 28 Oct 2007
Good Day To Hurt
'Twas not you
who saw me walking
'Twas not I
that saw you stammer
In all of this
'twas not us who mattered
So I'll take a mile
and you send a smile
At the end of the day
the rain will still fall
Unless you run my mile
and I wear your smile
Today's an odd day
for sitting still
'Twas not you
who saw me walking
'Twas not I
that saw you stammer
In all of this
'twas not us who mattered
So I'll take a mile
and you send a smile
At the end of the day
the rain will still fall
Unless you run my mile
and I wear your smile
Today's an odd day
for sitting still
CHRISTMAS PEDOBEAR 28 Oct 2007
nuker, you have a rare ability...you can put feelings into writing.
i have another...i understand it.
thank you
i have another...i understand it.
thank you
Lord Atlantis 28 Oct 2007
This poem has mixed feelings behind it, its hard to grasp the emotion behind it.
Dauth 29 Oct 2007
Fourteen lines and you capture love, time, pain, and you round off with patience.
It's a shame you only write when unhappy, I would love to see a poem with your mood elated.
It's a shame you only write when unhappy, I would love to see a poem with your mood elated.
Ellipsis 29 Oct 2007
Quote
These pieces are top notch! *steals them for use in 3rd period English honors*
What he said!
Sgt. Nuker 29 Oct 2007
Thank you all for your kind remarks. I don't know why specifically that I write what seems to be the most depressing of literature, but that's just how it turns out when I'm finished. I try to spin something jubilant and care-free, but it seems there is something sub-conscience that oils its way into my prose and verse. Whatever beauty mark I may try to give it, seems to have the opposite effect on its tone.
@Dauth: From the comment about my most recent work, I believe that's my best piece to date, simple as it may be. Thank you.
Regards,
Nuker
@Dauth: From the comment about my most recent work, I believe that's my best piece to date, simple as it may be. Thank you.
Regards,
Nuker
E.V.E. 02 Nov 2007
And once again, another Writing wich makes me think about it for quite some Time.
Nicely written Nuker.
- E.V.E.
Nicely written Nuker.
- E.V.E.
Sgt. Nuker 04 Nov 2007
A Toast To The Inescapable
Wish me luck
as you watch me fall
Forever have these wordless taunts
and motionless actions
forbade a pleasant night's sleep
Living in a dream
and yet to some degree
a walking nightmare
have I been fed
Now as the music flows
and rocks me to parts unknown
I've balanced my conscience
and tipped the past
in favor of playing with the storm
You scribe words
on ironed out trees
but I paint my soul
on the world's playground
It's nothing black and blue
but negative space
and everything together
So here's to you
my truly inescapable
Wish me luck
as you watch me fall
Forever have these wordless taunts
and motionless actions
forbade a pleasant night's sleep
Living in a dream
and yet to some degree
a walking nightmare
have I been fed
Now as the music flows
and rocks me to parts unknown
I've balanced my conscience
and tipped the past
in favor of playing with the storm
You scribe words
on ironed out trees
but I paint my soul
on the world's playground
It's nothing black and blue
but negative space
and everything together
So here's to you
my truly inescapable
Lord Atlantis 04 Nov 2007
For some unexplainable reason I feel as if I know what emotion you are letting out today. Its a deep poem, one that after reading several times keeps showing me new insight into what it paints. Very nice job.
Dauth 05 Nov 2007
Performing the ultimate art, causing a thought, many many times over.
You can see this being read out to as the narration to a film. I don't quite know what film however.
You can see this being read out to as the narration to a film. I don't quite know what film however.
IPS 05 Nov 2007
wow even if I have to think a lot to undestand them exactly, the feelings are great!
realy realy great work man!
realy realy great work man!
Sgt. Nuker 09 Nov 2007
A Breath In D Minor
Don't mock the nonsense
just sing the chorus
Nobody likes hot air resonance
Walk (down) the line
and keep perfect time
a midnight jaunt
from a clock once chimed
Ribbon-tailed fantasy
meets purple-faced reality
Psycho-tripping analyst
Thinking of brown bags and apathy
Brown bags and apathy
(our) Apathy makes a stirred pot cold
A beggar's truth
will guide you home
Don't mock the nonsense
just sing the chorus
Nobody likes hot air resonance
Walk (down) the line
and keep perfect time
a midnight jaunt
from a clock once chimed
Ribbon-tailed fantasy
meets purple-faced reality
Psycho-tripping analyst
Thinking of brown bags and apathy
Brown bags and apathy
(our) Apathy makes a stirred pot cold
A beggar's truth
will guide you home
Wizard 10 Nov 2007
I have no idea why but I love the last two lines.
I can't say why but I find that line incredibly sublime.
*salutes* Major Nuker the Majestic Noter
Edited by Wizardofnoz, 10 November 2007 - 01:47.
Quote
A beggar's truth
will guide you home
will guide you home
I can't say why but I find that line incredibly sublime.
*salutes* Major Nuker the Majestic Noter
Edited by Wizardofnoz, 10 November 2007 - 01:47.
Dauth 10 Nov 2007
I have to concur with Wizard here, the lsat two lines add more to the poem than you would be inclined to think, especially when you read it for a second and third time.
Sgt. Nuker 10 Nov 2007
Thanks gents .
In a bit of rare inspiration, I've come up with one more poem. 'Twas not intended, but the idea flickered long enough for me to take hold.
Dismantled Vision
These words you've thrown at me
have drawn black lines
These stains I've sown
have painted black souls
and now these words I script
have tainted my eyes shut
(live in constant dream)
.......Come quickly.....
....my immortal
In a bit of rare inspiration, I've come up with one more poem. 'Twas not intended, but the idea flickered long enough for me to take hold.
Dismantled Vision
These words you've thrown at me
have drawn black lines
These stains I've sown
have painted black souls
and now these words I script
have tainted my eyes shut
(live in constant dream)
.......Come quickly.....
....my immortal
Z_mann 10 Nov 2007
You truly have talent for poetry, Nuker. I'm still trying to figure out all the metaphors. Brilliant, just brilliant.
Did you try publishing any of this? I believe it would be very well accepted.
Did you try publishing any of this? I believe it would be very well accepted.
Lord Atlantis 10 Nov 2007
I believe he said somewhere that he hasn't published his work, and I don't know if he will ever publish any of his work.
But your newest poem... I really don't exactly know what feeling its trying to bring across. But all I know is that it has something to it... something that at the moment I can't see.
But your newest poem... I really don't exactly know what feeling its trying to bring across. But all I know is that it has something to it... something that at the moment I can't see.
Nid 10 Nov 2007
Have youever thought of lyric writing for songs?
Like you have a nack for these verses, and they would be really good meaningful stuff in songs as well.
If you can play an instrument and sing at the same time, I'd pay to watch you
Like you have a nack for these verses, and they would be really good meaningful stuff in songs as well.
If you can play an instrument and sing at the same time, I'd pay to watch you
Sgt. Nuker 10 Nov 2007
I can't play an instrument, and believe me when I say this, you don't want to hear me sing . What you see here is the extent of my talent. The verses are influenced by the bands I listen to. Bands like Project 86, MewithoutYou, and Tourniquet, who aren't afraid to use high dollar words in their lyrics.
This is not to say that I don't have a general sound of a song playing in my head when I write. Some of my poems may look complete, but because they aren't put to music, I just feel they're a little unfinished.
@Nidmeister: If you want to use one of my poems for a song, go ahead. Just let me know which one, or I can even suggest one to you. If you do use one, please give me due credit.
@Z Mann: I have thought of publishing some of my works, but I haven't as of yet. To be very honest, I wouldn't know where to start or who to go to, to even get them noticed to get published.
Thanks everyone for your comments. Your kind words are what keep me posting my heartfelt verses.
Kind regards,
Nuker
This is not to say that I don't have a general sound of a song playing in my head when I write. Some of my poems may look complete, but because they aren't put to music, I just feel they're a little unfinished.
@Nidmeister: If you want to use one of my poems for a song, go ahead. Just let me know which one, or I can even suggest one to you. If you do use one, please give me due credit.
@Z Mann: I have thought of publishing some of my works, but I haven't as of yet. To be very honest, I wouldn't know where to start or who to go to, to even get them noticed to get published.
Thanks everyone for your comments. Your kind words are what keep me posting my heartfelt verses.
Kind regards,
Nuker
Dauth 10 Nov 2007
Just had a chat with my gf about publishing things since she's looked into it.
She has the older version of this book http://www.amazon.com/Writers-Artists-Year...3970&sr=8-1 and it may be of use to you, also try to reference section at your local library, that may show some good ideas.
She has the older version of this book http://www.amazon.com/Writers-Artists-Year...3970&sr=8-1 and it may be of use to you, also try to reference section at your local library, that may show some good ideas.
Z_mann 11 Nov 2007
Quote
This is not to say that I don't have a general sound of a song playing in my head when I write. Some of my poems may look complete, but because they aren't put to music, I just feel they're a little unfinished.
I believe an artist's work is never truly finished. There is always that little gap to match perfection; at least, such is the case with me and my (few) works.
BTW Music is my main inspiration too
Quote
To be very honest, I wouldn't know where to start or who to go to, to even get them noticed to get published.
Try and get in touch with other young, unexperienced artists. I have a friend who is getting her first novel published by the end of the year. I can talk to her if you would like to.
EDIT: Typo-mania
Edited by Z_mann, 11 November 2007 - 11:59.
Nid 12 Nov 2007
Major Nuker, on 10 Nov 2007, 21:36, said:
@Nidmeister: If you want to use one of my poems for a song, go ahead. Just let me know which one, or I can even suggest one to you. If you do use one, please give me due credit.
Ahh, I couldn't do that, I don't like the idea of artists not using their own material. It would be hypocritical of me to take any of your writings.
no offense intended, I'd much prefer to use my own material, it gives me a sense of, not exactly honour but whole credit on completion of a song.
Sgt. Nuker 15 Nov 2007
Another Lucid Thought
A voice
A voice
The tiny little voice
sings in my head
Tells me things to think
and whether I may weep
for the spilt milk
upon her head
Today
Today
the mind it plays tricks
pick up sticks
and walk away
Come again
another day
Just go wandering
just head home
Which way to go
with everywhere to head
So many ways to turn
where the blacktop ends
Always forget
Never remember
Always remember
Never forget
'tis reversed etiquette
and required reflex
A voice
A voice
The tiny little voice
sings in my head
Tells me things to think
and whether I may weep
for the spilt milk
upon her head
Today
Today
the mind it plays tricks
pick up sticks
and walk away
Come again
another day
Just go wandering
just head home
Which way to go
with everywhere to head
So many ways to turn
where the blacktop ends
Always forget
Never remember
Always remember
Never forget
'tis reversed etiquette
and required reflex
Dauth 16 Nov 2007
I first read this poem while listenign to One by Metallica, and it would seem the two are linked in content.
It's a shame to read of someone trapped in their own head, it would seem you have a lot on your mind.
It's a shame to read of someone trapped in their own head, it would seem you have a lot on your mind.