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[Zero]

Well, I'm starting my book over....again. I almost never do poetry, but am trying to create several worlds and societies within the book, so I felt that culture is a MUST. So here is poem made by Trace Ashikawa about himself. It depicts what he thinks about himself and is used in the prologue (which I am now finishing up). It's dark and depressing.... I LOVE IT!!!!! Please, if anything sounds wrong, let me know. I'll post any other poetry I can come up with, but I won't make any promises-in other words, it won't be any time soon.

[indent]I am the Seller,
My smiles bring death,
My laughs bring plagues,
My joy brings war,
My love begets genocide,

I am the Dealer, Sin,
Mine eyes belong to Judgment,
Mine ears belong to Chaos,
Mine lips belong to War,
Mine hands belong to Death,

I am the sin, Will,
Lucifer bows to me,
Beelzebub serves me,
Satan worships me,
God despises me,
The angels...they cannot stop me,

I am the Horseman, Pestilence,
The fires of hell, rest at the souls of my feet,
Where I walk, only embers are left,
Where I sleep, demons have slept,
Where I stand, the Devil stands,

I am Horseman, Death,
If I love, I must kill,
If I hate, I must love,
Because I love her, I must kill her,

I am the evil, Envy,
Women come to me,
Wealth is natural to me,
Men envy me,
The people all love me, are drawn to me,
The woman I love, she hates me,
The woman I love, she loves me,
The woman I love, she dies for me

I am all that is Temptation,
I am the lover of War,
I am the vessel of Envy,
I am the aphrodisiac of Lust,
I am the commander of Death,
I am the master of hell,

I am he, the Harbinger of Doom,
With a smile, my hands slaughter millions,
At my feet, millions die,
My actions doom worlds,
Hades is humbled by me,
Cerberus kneels to me,
Worlds burn for me,

I am the Angel... Death
My tongue is of fire,
I live only by the blade,
I weep only for her,
I love only her,
I die only for her,

I am the Servant,
She is my goddess,
I worship her,
I cry for her,
I die for her,
I love her,
Why must I kill her?

I am he, God,
I love her,
I adore her,
I kill for her,
I abstain from her,
I cannot hate her,
I can only love her...
I can love, only her...
[/indent]

What do you think? Commentary of any kind acceptable (+/-). Actually, tbh, this is my first real attempt at poetry EVER! I like it, but can't help feel something is missing/wrong.

Edited by Zero, 29 January 2009 - 20:11.