1469 replies to this topic

[Alias]

Quote

A German man has blown up his apartment while trying to fix his leaky air mattress, his city's fire brigade said.

The man, 45, from Duesseldorf in Germany's west, used tyre-repair solvent to plug a hole in his airbed and left it overnight.

It blew up when he went to inflate it the next day.

"A spark from the electric air pump ignited it," a fire brigade spokesman said.

The blast pushed his living-room wall into the building's stairwell and caused extensive damage to walls, windows and furniture.

Fire fighters evacuated the 12-apartment building and a neighbouring housing block while they checked for structural damage.

The man suffered burns on his arms, while a three-year-old girl suffered first-degree burns.

http://www.abc.net.a.../16/2627129.htm

[Ixonoclast]

http://www.abc.net.a.../21/2631566.htm

The Australian police shot a man with a tazer... and this is the joke... the guy was petrol sniffing.

[Alias]

Quote

After six years together, the relationship between a pair of gay male penguins at San Francisco zoo is apparently over, with Harry leaving Pepper for another penguin - Linda.

The Los Angeles Times reported Friday (local time) that the relationship between Harry and Pepper, who lived side-by-side protecting eggs abandoned by other penguins, came to a shocking end when Harry moved into a neighbouring nest with recently-widowed Linda.

The development has sparked a variety of reactions in the blogosphere, where Linda has been called a "home wrecker" who "lives for her own happiness, no matter who gets hurt".

Harrison Edell, a curator of birds at the zoo, had a more pragmatic explanation, noting that Linda's recently-deceased partner was a leader of sorts among the small zoo penguin community, commanding not one but two nests.

"For penguins, real estate means a lot," Mr Edell told the Los Angeles Times, so "as far as penguins go, she was a pretty attractive prospect".

With Pepper rejoining the ranks of the single, Christian website OneNewsNow.com took the split as a sign that "nature prefers heterosexual relationships".

Others were more sympathetic to the bereft Pepper.

John, writing on The Frigging Loon blog, said he was "heartbroken" about the split and that he hopes Pepper "finds another male penguin that is 10 times hotter than Harry!".

http://www.abc.net.a.../19/2629864.htm

[Ion Cannon!]

People actually wrote stuff like that on their blogs? Do they really have nothing better to write about...

[Destiny]

Quote

The same blue food dye found in M&Ms and Gatorade could be used to reduce damage caused by spine injuries, offering a better chance of recovery, according to new research.

Rats injected with BBG not only regained their mobility but temporarily turned blue.

Researchers at the University of Rochester Medical Center found that when they injected the compound Brilliant Blue G (BBG) into rats suffering spinal cord injuries, the rodents were able to walk again, albeit with a limp.

The only side effect was that the treated mice temporarily turned blue.

Blue M&Ms linked to reducing spine injury

...so Brainiacs shouldn't have eaten veggies

[BeefJeRKy]

Quote

Woman getting married to fairground ride

Amy Wolfe, a US church organist who claims to have objectum sexuality, a condition that makes sufferers attracted to inanimate objects, plans to marry a magic carpet fairground ride.

http://bit.ly/l8avG

Um what? This is just plain weird.

[Admiral Wesley]

Okay. That's just fucked up. First of all, THE GIRL LOOKS LIKE A GUY! What is she going to to do? Have sex with the handlebars? I'm just wondering, because if she's gonna marry the ride, then... FUGGHEDABOUDIT!

I once saw on an episode of Smoking Gun Presents World's Dumbest Criminals a guy who stuck his dick in a hole in the middle of a patio table. Another story about objectum sexuality.

Also, I heard about a drunk guy who carved a hole in a pumpkin with his pocketknife and screwed the pumpkin. WOW....

[Kris]

Destiny, on 28 Jul 2009, 23:18, said:

Quote

The same blue food dye found in M&Ms and Gatorade could be used to reduce damage caused by spine injuries, offering a better chance of recovery, according to new research.

Rats injected with BBG not only regained their mobility but temporarily turned blue.

Researchers at the University of Rochester Medical Center found that when they injected the compound Brilliant Blue G (BBG) into rats suffering spinal cord injuries, the rodents were able to walk again, albeit with a limp.

The only side effect was that the treated mice temporarily turned blue.

Blue M&Ms linked to reducing spine injury

...so Brainiacs shouldn't have eaten veggies

*sings i'm blue*




I'm blue dabadee dabadaa!!

Scope, on 11 Aug 2009, 1:38, said:

Quote

Woman getting married to fairground ride

Amy Wolfe, a US church organist who claims to have objectum sexuality, a condition that makes sufferers attracted to inanimate objects, plans to marry a magic carpet fairground ride.

http://bit.ly/l8avG

Um what? This is just plain weird.

EPIC WHAT?! This is just weird...But hey, she can now

Spoiler

[i]sexually[/]

ride it forever

[SquigPie]

Tsk, tsk, A fairground ride, how lowly, normal people get married to their computers or jobs.

[Slightly Wonky Robob]

Quote

Nigel Jardine, 56, from Leeds, West Yorkshire, walked 1,060 metres in one hour around an octagonal circuit of glass at the Bageecha restaurant in his home town of Horsforth – breaking the previous record of 960 metres.

The sports coach and motivational expert carried on for 27-and-a-half hours until he had covered the equivalent of 30 kilometres, or 18 miles.

He said: "I'm used to walking on broken glass but I suppose the customers at the restaurant weren't used to watching someone do it as they tucked into their meals."

Mr Jardine was allowed five-minute breaks every hour during the challenge to have a drink, visit the lavatory or have a lie down.

His feat was in aid of Action for Children, the leading children’s charity. He said he felt a strong connection with the charity’s work because he was abused as a child mentally and physically, both at home and at school.

He said the glass walk reflected a child’s response to abuse: treading carefully, avoiding pain, not wanting to get hurt.

The manager of the restaurant, Hena Khatun, said: “Nigel is a regular customer here and we knew that he had been doing this and things like it, walking on glass and fire, for quite a while in his job.

“We got involved because he asked if we could give him the space to try the record attempt and we were happy to agree because we trust him, he’s good at what he does.

“We’ve got one huge room with capacity for about 90 seats, so we gave him one side of it and we’ve still had our usual customers come in and use the other side. It didn’t really put them off, they were surprised of course but were quite happy with it.”

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/607...r-18-miles.html

Ouch

Quote

Simon Simpkins, a father of two, said he was shocked at the "pornographic" poses when he bought the sour candy for his children Benjamin and Ofelia.

Mr Simpkins, of Pontefract, West Yorks, told The Sun: "The lemon and lime are locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter.

"The lime, who I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face. I demanded to see the shop manager and, during a heated exchange, my wife became quite distressed and had to sit down in the car park."

Haribo said the sweets, which feature illustrations of lemon, lime and cherry characters, said the "fun" packaging was introduced in Germany in 2002.

A spokesman said: "This jovial MAOAM man is very popular with fans, both young and old."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/foodanddrink/fo...t-wrappers.html

There's always one

Edited by Bob, 29 September 2009 - 13:57.

[BeefJeRKy]

That first story shows quite a brave man. And the guy from the second story simply has a dirty mind. The fruits look like they are wrestling or something.

[Pav:3d]

She got sit-down-in-car-park distressed? damn thats distressed

And fking WHY@ the walking on glass story, just why subject yourself to that

[Brad]

The first guy seems like a professional, a weird profession mind you.

And he second guy is just dirty minded, so yeah I agree with Scope

[BeefJeRKy]

Quote

Man's ashes laid to rest in computer

I wonder how many of you already know where you would like your ashes to live in perpetuity.

In a Cupertino parking lot, perhaps? Or strewn on the steps of a certain academy of sciences?

I only ask because it seems that a geeky man called Alan seems not to have wondered about this. With the result that his eternally powdered life is now being spent inside a SPARCstation computer.

One assumes this is what they call a SPARC of respect.

A Flickr member called Sam 3.14, who appears to be Alan's brother, explained on the site that it was he who decided to place Alan's ashes inside one of the most precious creations under the Sun.



Sam described it thusly on his Flickr page: "I kept the floppy drive cover but for space reasons removed the floppy drive, hard drive, and most of the power supply. I left behind the motherboard and power switch and plugs to keep all openings covered."

Which seems like a wise and brotherly gesture.

Sam continued: "The case worked quite well at his memorial party. His friends and family were able to leave their final good-byes on post-it notes. Anyone who wanted to keep their words private could just slip their note into the case through the floppy slot."

I would have liked to have had the chance to offer some private words myself. These might have included the words "brother" "slightly" and "nutty."

However, after an e-mail correspondence with Sam (who sent me Alan's obituary), I am convinced that not only is the story true, but that this was, indeed, a loving gesture.

What was also quite delightful about the SPARCstation is the inscription "Beam Me Up Scotty I'm Done Here," as these seem to have been some of Alan's last words.

Sam's fascinating mausoleum seems to have created an unintended consequence, however. As he puts it: "His daughters like the look of it so much they aren't now sure if they want to bury him."

So I wonder, please, would readers offer their ideas for an ideal ashen casket? Surely you might aspire to more than a SPARCstation? Something with an Apple logo, perhaps? Or would that be too expensive?

[deltaepsilon]

I wouldn't be seen dead with an Apple.

[BeefJeRKy]

deltaepsilon, on 3 Oct 2009, 6:45, said:

I wouldn't be seen dead with an Apple.

What? The SPARCStation is a Sun Microsystems product.

[Slightly Wonky Robob]

Quote

LOS ANGELES -- Want to have a baby that looks like your favorite celebrity? It just a whole lot easier to design your future baby, thanks to a Los Angeles sperm bank.

" California Cryobank" announced Tuesday that it has started posting photos of celebrities who resemble their donors to give prospective clients a better idea of what their potential offspring might look like.

"The number one client question we get is: `Who does this donor look like?"' said Scott Brown of California Cryobank. "We decided this would be a great way to give thorough and consistent answers. Clients love it. Look-a-Likes has only been available for a week and our Web site traffic is up 50 percent."

Brown said the sperm bank is choosy, accepting fewer than 1 percent of people who apply to be donors. The screening process includes genetic testing, regular blood tests, a three-generation family medical history, and a sperm count/quality in the top 15 percent of the population, he said.

A group of employees spent six months putting together the photos and matching them to donors.

Clients can search for attributes such as height or eye and hair color, and the database will return a list of donors who each have two or three celebrity look-alikes. Users also can choose from an existing library of celebrities to generate a list of matching donors, according to California Cyrobank, which was started in 1977.

http://www.ktla.com/news/landing/ktla-cele...0,1154842.story

Quote

Paula Sunshine, 42, has gathered up her raw material from local hairdressers as well as using her own and her dogs.

The expert craftswoman and author teaches traditional building techniques to builders, owners of old homes and those interested in tried and tested construction methods.

But Miss Sunshine decided to substitute cattle hair in her lime render mixture with human hair when she came to extend her thatched 16th century home.

The new extension not only has her own hair mixed into the walls but also those of her pet dogs.

She is also planning to use human hair as she carries out renovation work to the rest of her magnificent timber-framed house.

Ms Sunshine, of Lawshall, near Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk, said: "I do wattle and daub here using straw and the lime render on the outside is lime plaster and hair.

"Traditionally people would use cattle hair from long-haired cattle.

"But we don't get many long-haired cattle around here any more so I use human hair."

She added: "People say it is not thick enough but you just put more in.

"I don't human hair is a lot different.

"It is just the fibre that you need the hair for and human hair does the same thing as cattle hair for plaster.

"It is the fibres that holds the plaster together."

Ms Sunshine said she had been surprised by the number of people who have underlying red hair.

"I was speaking to a hairdresser who told me a lot of people in Britain have red hair as their base colour and that applies to brunettes and blondes," she said.

"I've probably got my own hair in there and that of my dogs from when they were moulting.

Ms Sunshine said some people have even said the human hair will smell.

"I always go to female hair salons because women usually have their washed before a cut which means their hair is very clean.

"I have to say, my bin full of hair smells divine with all the products used and it is very clean hair," she said.

"Besides which, once it has been mixed in with lime it is clean anyway."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics...human-hair.html

[CodeCat]

Bob, on 5 Oct 2009, 17:51, said:

"I don't human hair is a lot different.

She accidentally the whole sentence.

[Destiny]

Quote

UST as some people have a better self-image than others, so it seems do countries. In a poll of 33 nations by the Reputation Institute, a branding consultancy, people were asked to rate their trust, admiration, respect and pride in their country. The results are presented as an index.

Countries' self-image

I never expected THEM to be the top O.o

[Slightly Wonky Robob]

Quote

A Ministry of Defence document giving advice on how to stop documents leaking onto the internet has been leaked onto the internet.



The Defence Manual of Security is intended to help MoD, armed forces and intelligence personnel maintain information security in the face of hackers, journalists, foreign spies and others.

But the 2,400-page restricted document has found its way on to Wikileaks, a website that publishes anonymous leaks of sensitive information from organisations including governments, corporations and religions.

Known in the services as Joint Services Protocol 440 (JSP 440), it was published in 2001. As Wikileaks notes, it is the document that is used as justification for the monitoring of certain websites, including Wikileaks itself.

Under the section “Leaks of Official Information", it says: "Leaks usually take the form of reports in the public media which appear to involve the unauthorised disclosure of official information (whether protectively marked or not) that causes political harm or embarrassment to either the UK Government or the Department concerned…

"The threat [of leakage] is less likely to arise from positive acts of counter-espionage, than from leakage of information through disaffected members of staff, or as a result of the attentions of an investigative journalist, or simply by accident or carelessness."

The document is particularly keen to avoid the attentions of journalists, noting them as "threats" alongside foreign intelligence services, criminals, terrorist groups and disaffected staff.

As far as traditional espionage and intelligence threats go, the document singles out the Chinese as having "a voracious appetite for all kinds of information; political, military, commercial, scientific and technical."

However, it is "very different to the portrayal of 'Moscow Rules' in the novels of John Le Carre". The Chinese agencies do not "run agents", but instead "make friends", as befits intelligence officers in the Facebook era.

Wikileaks was also behind the memorable leaks of the British National Party membership list, the operating procedures at Guantanamo Bay and the secret workings of the Church of Scientology.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics...-is-leaked.html

[Pav:3d]

WHY DOES THIS GOVT CONTINUE TO FAIL SO DAMN HARD

[Ion Cannon!]

The MoD has been losing stuff for god knows how long. What was it, 28 laptops last year alone? Bloody incompetent morons.

[Destiny]

Wasn't there one about an agent leaving top-secret documents on a train or something back then?

[Pav:3d]

Yeah, once again brought to you by the MoD

[Kalo]

Ion Cannon!, on 7 Oct 2009, 16:18, said:

The MoD has been losing stuff for god knows how long. What was it, 28 laptops last year alone? Bloody incompetent morons.

Although I'm not trying to start up an arguement...People say Bush was bad... 28 laptops? Jesus.