229 replies to this topic

[Judgement]

But a much better time to say the least.

As to CoLT, well your making progress. If she agreed to do your scene than that means that she does indeed like you. Usually they would just go there way but if they like someone they tend to lean towards them(not literally).

[Ascendancy]

I'm gonna throw my couple cents in, but it's nice to hear you've made progress.

I kind of work in a mysterious way when it comes to liking girls. I mean sometimes it's very out and out obvious that I like some girl and sometimes I show little subtle things. I'll be honest my stroke of luck with relationships hasn't been too great. I've been dumped for some of the dumbest reasons, and some of them were actually good (because I admit, I screwed things up a couple times).

Love is something well, I think we can feel for someone even at a young age. While it does indeed take time to really feel a true love for someone we can go off a whim and see where it goes. In fact attraction is kinda like that I feel, you go off and think "Hey I like so and so because they're cool and such, perhaps there could be something more behind this".

See personally it took me a while to understand how relationships and attraction works, because there was a time where I really liked this one girl and I really thought I loved her, turns out she didn't like me one bit. Her friend knew what kind of situation I was in and she helped me out so much through that whole period I was really depressed. I still think if I saw her friend today I would thank her for everything she did to help me.

Now that I understand how the cycle of attraction and relationships work, I've been able to try and keep something alive. To be even more honest my longest relationship was 1 year and 3 months, with a girl who I never met and lived 2,500 miles away from me. That's how dedicated we were. In fact I was a month away from going to go see her, then things got bad and we broke up. We talked on the phone nearly everyday, said we loved each other all the time, and so on.

To top this off, I personally believe if there is someone out there who's very far away from you, and the attraction is strong enough that you can pull off a long distance relationship and you finally meet because you were that dedicated to one another and the attraction was strong, then you did something a lot of people cannot.

[CoLT]

UPDATE

This happened during rehearsal for an inclass performance.

I was playing out a part of the scene, including movements.
I pulled her close so that she was by my side with my arm around her and I said my line. "just two things."
I waited for her to say her line... looking into her eyes...
...and she just looked right back... musta been about 6 seconds or more... and then she just shook her head, as though she was bringing herself back to reality. And then just walked away a bit and said,
"Oh sorry, I thought you were going to say something out of context."
The sentence doesn't really make any sense.
It's as though she meant something else but I think it just came out wrong.
And then she went and sat down quiet for a bit before we started the scene again.

to me, if she didn't like me, she would move away when i pulled her close like that IF she thought I wasn't acting.

What do you guys (and girls, heh) make of it?

[Sgt. Nuker]

For that limited time she was looking into your eyes, she was most likely thinking what it would be like to date you. The eyes of a person can tell a lot, for our eyes are "windows to the soul". Inside she could have been thinking any number of things, from "I really should have worn more/less makeup" all the way to "I regret not dating this *insert positive adjective of choice* guy". I've had that look before....and I miss it.

The sentence she uttered to you, may seem off-kilter to you, but to her it was a fluid responce to the thoughts in her head. Remember this fact for future meetings.

And about her not pushing away after you pulled her close: 1) It could be that she was just going along with the act. 2) Maybe she likes you and secretly wanted you to do that, or 3) maybe she just didn't feel like fighting against you. There could be more variables that I'm not hitting on, but I believe those are the 3 main reasons. At first she might not have wanted you to pull her close, but when your eyes met, she probably saw something that she's always wanted, and upon realizing that, she walked away, most likely thinking "Can it be?....No, it can't....can it?" I don't really know if that's what she was thinking, but it could be along those lines.

Anyway, I hope this helps, even if it is only a little bit. Best of luck to you in the future mate, and who knows, your charm and kindness may just win the day .


Best regards,

Nuker

[CoLT]

wow.... thanks nuker....

question: about your "1)", is that likely? because her sentence sounded like she didn't know I was acting. Of course, it didn't actually make sense to me but thats wat i thought it meant.

[Sgt. Nuker]

That's the issue with the internet, no voice tones are transmitted . If she didn't know, then you can ignore what I said in point #1.

If she said it like she didn't know you were acting, she probably thought you wanted her to really know two things, or she was waiting with baited breath and gazing into your eyes. When the rest of the sentence didn't come, the acting switch in her head was still off, and she responded in a real world sense.


Regards,

Nuker

[CoLT]

Well its not how she said it. she said those exact words... "I thought you were going to say something out of context"

I think she was trying to say that she thought I was going to say something out of the act. i.e. She thought I was going to say something that had nothing to do with the scene.

[Lord Atlantis]

We do miss those moments... but I cannot say how it would have turned out.

-Lord_Atlantis

[CoLT]

UPDATE

Today... she was strange. Like she was avoiding me... she didn't show up to rehearse the scene and we need to because we perform it first thing tomorrow...

And I didn't speak to her at all until after school when she was heading up to the 'pick up area'. It was just a really brief conversation we had before she, literally, ran up to catch up with her friends. She didn't need to, she didn't get picked up until much later...

It's starting to confuse me now.

[Sgt. Nuker]

Welcome to the many moods of a woman. It is something that you'll have to learn to deal with (actually all of us do).

It sounds like she's having difficulty dealing with the fact that you like her, or that she might like you. Of course, I don't really know if she's the one struggling or not, but it sounds like, to me at least, that she's trying not to think about you liking her and vice versa.


Regards,

Nuker

[CoLT]

hmm... maybe. I really don't know...

[Athena]

While most of Nuker's comment made somewhat sense, this in a way did not:

Major Nuker, on 7 May 2007, 15:03, said:

Welcome to the many moods of a woman.

Men can have that as well. Of course, writing it that way doesn't mean men can't, but I'd have written 'person' personally. I'd just like to say that this gender barrier isn't as big as people think it is, us women are people too.

[Whitey]

I could be wrong, but from what I've heard, women ARE more prone to mood swings than men are.

[Sgt. Nuker]

I didn't mean for my comment to come across as a gender bash, if that is indeed how it came across to you. I meant it as it seems (at least in my experience) a woman's mood changes more often than a guy's does during the course of a week, or even a day. It just seems this way, but I do recognize that it is different for every female. I know there are some guys whose mood can change "at the drop of a hat".


Regards,

Nuker

[Cryptkeeper]

i'am one of those men expecialy when i realy like someone but i never avoid someone thats just rude and illogical if you ask me however i may not go to that person if lets say they are like amanager or someone i realy don't like.

jeez i realy realy like this girl right now and did something i normaly would never do becuase just thinking about driving that deep into downtown austin on the highway no less gives me shivers. but i press foward and went to the movies with this girl jeez i'am liking her more and more

at the end she hugged me in the car when i droped her off at her house and i just went into the clouds XD i don't if she likes me like i like her but i realy enjoy being in her company.

jeex my every time i think about theres a presure in my chest i just hope nothing bad happans or it turns out that she doesn't feal tthem same way but if it does happan i'll just have to accept it

Edited by cryptkeeper, 08 May 2007 - 05:15.

[CoLT]

Crypt... you're falling in love man... that's what it is.

And me and this girl... well, if she doesn't feel the same way, at least I know for sure that we are on good terms. Altho, I do suspect that she might like me...

[Medve]

I don't know if this helps but sometimes you need to proceed slowly(like in my case). Maybe I will ask for help in later times if it's not a problem.

[CoLT]

Hey, np.. Everyone can ask questions here as well as post answers.

[CoLT]

BUMP

Update.

I cut a rose and wrote a small verse and gave them to her today.
I wrote,

Let this rose be but a token
Of words of my love unspoken.
If these feelings you do replicate
Pray, let me know, don't be too late.

She read it and smiled, then said simply, "thanks."
I didn't get an answer back as yet tho... cos i somehow forgot to go and ask later on.

This all occured during a drama rehearsal today.

[Sgt. Nuker]

If I had to guess, "thanks" wouldn't have been the reaction you were looking for from her, or any girl you were looking to date for that matter. She may have said that so she doesn't give away her true feelings, but you've been given glimpses of those in the past. Maybe she'll come around yet mate, though there is no certainty.


Regards,

Nuker

[Stinger]

"Thanks" to your romantic gesture must have come as a bit of a let down if you have high expectations.

I have been following this thread for a while now, and I am sorry to have to reply in the negative but contrasting my experiences in similar situations with those in my life who "got away" I think you're wasting your time based on the information you've given.

I'm sure you could change her mind if you were to use reverse psychology and a few little tricks of the trade but the reason you shouldn't do that is because then you are not being your true self. This comes from someone who learned the hard way.

[CoLT]

It's funny. I was just on the phone to a friend of mine and I've told her about this situation. She said exactly what you said, Stinger. Except she told me to try that first.
As for her feelings, I've yet to find out what they really are. I'm hoping for something positive... but that, to me, seems like setting myself up for a fall. I realise that she is what you may call "out of my league", yet at the same time, I'm not sure if that makes a difference so much.
I really have the feeling that I've made a mistake and that I should just let it all go. After all, I'm not so sure how I feel about her anymore. Everything, even songs on the radio, are saying "let go"...

I'm not sure what to do. Sometimes I can't think of anything else but her. I'm so detached though, so I have no idea if that means anything.
I know it may sound strange, but I can honestly say that sometimes I have no idea if I do or I don't like someone in that particular way.

I have a big performance tonight, the one I've been rehearsing for, and I had the opening to the performance last night. She was there, and I tried to strike up conversation. Once out of the many attempts, I had her full attention. But her reactions were... mediocre. It was probably what I was saying that was a little on the boring side, I'm not sure. But she just listened and didn't say much. The other times, I got a response out of her, but it was more of a distracted response. I guess it just goes to show that backstage during a performance, is not the best place for a conversation.

[LCPL Carrow]

Yeah, she was probably trying to focus on her parts and thinking about them, not what you were saying. Try to talk to her somewhere else and see how it goes, but don't get your hopes up. It sounds like it's all sliding downhill, dogg.

Best just to try and let it go, as hard as that is. Believe me, I know all to well. But here's a piece of advice: the best way to get over someone is to find someone else.

Good luck!

[CoLT]

Ok, last night went a little better. We talked quite a bit backstage. She knows her part well and so she didn't need to go over much. We talked about things, she was reasonably involved in the conversation. Smiling the whole time, we talked. She seems so much happier and more confident every time after we talk. Normally, she's quiet. Doesn't say much... even in class. Now, she's involved, asking questions... even volunteering to show off performance parts for the class.
She also looked so much happier after we talk. A few times, I caught her watching me, directly or in the many mirrors in the dressing room backstage. A couple of times, she caught me watching her too. And when we do 'catch' each other, we just hold the gaze for a bit before looking back to where we were.
I'm not sure, but to me, that seems like things are getting better.

[CoLT]

dbl post. Bah it's own thread

on a more serious note,
Tonight was the last night of the show and things did get a bit emotional backstage. But not for the reason that it was in fact the final show. I have a friend(girl) who liked another guy on the cast. She said openly how much she liked him but she said it in an offhand and slightly less serious manner so I didn't take it as seriously as I should have initially. Tonight, she broke down and ran out crying about him because he wasn't even talking to her and seemed to be avoiding her. She assumed this meant that he wasn't interested and didn't want to spend time with her because he knew she liked him.
This wasn't the case, it seems.

But as she ran out, before I could stop myself. I went out and held her, saying it was going to be alright. I didn't quite know what else to say. After that she ran into the darkness to be alone. I left her to be by herself but I could definitely feel her pain, a lot...

Before she left at the end of the show, she said she wasn't coming back to the school. I asked why and her reason was "stuff" but I knew it had something to do with this guy. I didn't know what more I could say to her but I felt like I should say something. And then she returned a second time to get cheek kisses (i.e. kisses on her cheek) from some of the other cast members, including me. When she came to me, it was so much onto her lips that it could be a half-lip kiss, technically.

Everyone else didn't get this and I'm not sure if it means anything. In any case, I don't want her to make such a rash decision.