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#1276 Major Fuckup

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Posted 18 March 2012 - 12:02

http://news.ninemsn....o-island.glance

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Three Japanese tourists found themselves in an embarrassing situation after their GPS led them to drive right into the muddy waters of Moreton Bay.

The trio were trying to get to North Stradbroke Island in Queensland yesterday when they took the wrong turn.

They travelled about 500m through mangrove mud, apparently unaware of the 15km of water separating them from their destination.

Yuzu Noda, 21, said their GPS guide "told us we could drive down there".

Fucken tourists :xD:

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#1277 Major Fuckup

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Posted 24 March 2012 - 09:42

http://www.abc.net.a...9444?section=wa

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A West Australian truckie has been charged after police found a widescreen television attached to the dashboard of his semi-trailer.
Police at Goulburn in New South Wales pulled over the truck after receiving reports from motorists on the Hume Highway of the driver's erratic driving.
They say the 32-centimetre television was hooked up to a portable DVD player.
In a statement, police said the television obscured a significant section of the windscreen.
The driver faces several charges including driving a vehicle without a clear view and driving while using a hand-held mobile phone.

I laughed so dam hard :xD:

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#1278 Chyros

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Posted 30 March 2012 - 12:29

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Vicar hospitalised with potato up his bum
A vicar claims a potato got stuck up his bottom after he fell on to the vegetable while hanging curtains in the nude.

The clergyman, in his 50s, told medical staff at Sheffield's Northern General Hospital that the accident was definitely not due to a sex game.

He had to undergo surgery to extract the spud from his backside, according to The Sun.

A&E nurse Trudi Watson said: 'He explained to me, quite sincerely, he had been hanging curtains naked in he kitchen when he fell backwards on to the kitchen table and on to a potato.

'But it's not for me to question his story.'
She went on to reveal other objects removed from people's derriére, including a cucumber, a Russian doll and a carnation.


Read more: http://www.metro.co....m#ixzz1qbOO3VL0


An Arsebishop? |8
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#1279 Chyros

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Posted 06 April 2012 - 15:27

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Buford, Wyoming (CNN) -- The population of the least populous town in the United States appeared to at least double Thursday when two mysterious businessmen from Vietnam won the tiny hamlet with a bid of $900,000 at auction.
About a dozen bidders gathered around the town's one business to bid on Buford, Wyoming, which consists of a gas station, a three-bedroom house and a few small outbuildings on 10 acres along Interstate 80.
The bidding began at $100,000 and quickly escalated. The winning bidders were immediately whisked away by auction officials, who would not let them speak to the media.
The town's only resident, Don Sammons, watched from the sidelines. He moved to Buford in 1980 with his wife and son. His wife died in 1995, and his son moved away in 2007. He had bought the town in 1990.
He fought back tears as the auctioneer declared the town sold.
2010: Wyoming man has his own ZIP code
"I don't know when it will hit me. I've lived here half my life. I'm an emotional person, and I hope I handle it in an adult manner," he said.
Tonjah Andrews, a real estate broker from Cheyenne who was hired to represent the men, said she would not disclose their names. She said the men flew in from Vietnam after learning about the auction from online news stories.
She would not comment on what the men plan to do with the town.
Sammons bought a house in Windsor, Colorado, to be closer to his son and plans on writing a book about his 32 years in Buford.
He said he'll miss his one-man town, but one thing he won't miss is the billboard with his face on it that has become a familiar sight to drivers in Interstate 80. Buford is about halfway between Laramie and Cheyenne and is the second oldest town in the state.
"I can always rent one somewhere if I need to see my face," he said with a laugh.


http://edition.cnn.c...tion/index.html

Mercuh is being bought by the Vietnamese, oh the irony :xD: .
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#1280 Krieger22

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Posted 07 April 2012 - 08:05

http://www.suntimes....-dashboard.html
It actually happened :xD:

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Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1281 Alias

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Posted 07 April 2012 - 10:06

Welcome to Australia. 8|

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#1282 Chyros

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Posted 07 April 2012 - 11:15

View PostAlias, on 07 April 2012 - 10:06, said:

Welcome to Australia. 8|
Why is nothing that has anything to do with Australia normal?! :lol:
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#1283 General

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Posted 07 April 2012 - 18:03

View PostChyros, on 07 April 2012 - 11:15, said:

View PostAlias, on 07 April 2012 - 10:06, said:

Welcome to Australia. 8|
Why is nothing that has anything to do with Australia normal?! :lol:


Australia too far away it is ok to call there as another dimension, creatures living over there are different too...

#1284 Libains

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Posted 13 April 2012 - 14:42

Super hamster! http://www.bbc.co.uk...nshire-17688011
For there can be no death without life.

#1285 Libains

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Posted 13 April 2012 - 16:05

Actually, better yet: http://www.bbc.co.uk...707197#FBM87037
For there can be no death without life.

#1286 Major Fuckup

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 14:02

http://www.abc.net.a...e-giant/3970388

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UK software company Micro Focus is demanding at least $10 million in damages from NSW Police.
It claims NSW Police has been using pirated copies of their computer software for more than a decade to run their COPS (Computerised Operational Police System) - the largest criminal intelligence database in the country.
It was a routine request from the NSW Ombudsman's office back in August 2010 that first set off alarm bells for Bruce Craig, the Australasian managing director of Micro Focus.
"Our team was out at the Ombudsman's and in a conversation they said they were accessing the COPS database using our software," he told 7.30.
"And we said what software - you don't own our software?"
The software in question is called ViewNow. It is a mainframe computer program NSW Police began using in 1998 to access the COPS database, which holds the highly confidential details of just about every citizen in the state.
Cybercrime investigator Michael Speck says the COPS database operates like the "nervous system" of the NSW police and holds critical intelligence on everything from criminal histories to victims of crime.
[indent]

When someone pirates your software you think who am I gonna call, the police? In this case, they're the pirates.
Bruce Craig from Micro Focus[/indent]

Micro Focus says after the Ombudsman's query they started investigating and were astounded to discover police had been duplicating their software, then sharing the stolen booty with other law enforcement agencies.
And not just the Ombudsman's Office, but two other state untouchables - the Department of Correctives Services and the Police Integrity Commission.
"When someone pirates your software you think who am I going to call, the police?" Mr Craig said.
"In this case, they're the pirates."
Mr Craig says Micro Focus' contract with police was very specific.
He says police were allowed to use up to 6,500 ViewNow licences and if they wanted any more, they would have to pay for them.
"The licenses were for police only. Yet police were out there handing out our software like confetti," he said.
'Out of control'

But it gets worse. Micro Focus say when they asked police just how many of the 6,500 ViewNow licenses they were using, a police employee allegedly told them: "Oh f--k. We've rolled out 16,000 devices".
"They did not pay for those extra licenses," Mr Craig said.
"It's incredible. It shows an organisation that's completely out of control."
Mr Craig says police have spent the past 18 months stalling.
At first, he says, police claimed they had lost the contract. He says they then told him it was impossible to tell exactly how many of the 20,000-strong police workforce had been using the software over the past decade.
Mr Speck, a former NSW detective, says the idea that NSW Police - the fifth largest police force in the world - cannot track every piece of software they are using seems extraordinary.
"Cant find the license is the pirates' equivalent of the dog ate my homework," he said.
"Let's just get that out in the open straight away.
"A lot of money - a lot of the public's money - is being spent here defending what appears to be indefensible."
'Investigating the investigators'

But according to former police computer forensics investigator, Clinton Towers, trying to "investigate the investigators" is going to be a major challenge for Micro Focus.
When Micro Focus asked to come in and do their own audit - one of the conditions of the contract - police refused, and called in their lawyers instead.
"They said if we wanted to audit them we would require a court order," Mr Craig said.
"The minute we advised police there was an issue they began de-installing our software. They de-installed it without keeping records."
In essence, the NSW Police defence is that it has all been a terrible misunderstanding.
In its statement of defence before the Federal Court, NSW Police say on their reading of their contract, Micro Focus had not limited them to 6,500 ViewNow licenses. Rather, it gave them the right to reproduce as many licenses as they wanted.
"No software company would give away their IP forever for unlimited use," Mr Craig said.
[indent]

You think about copyright like a hire car agreement. When the agreement runs out you can't continue to drive the car and you certainly can't give it to your mates.
Cybercrime investigator Michael Speck[/indent]

"In this case its quite clear what their usage limit is, it's 6,500 and they have clearly gone way beyond that number."
Mr Speck agrees the idea any company would give away its copyright for free is "just implausible".
"You think about copyright like a hire car agreement," he said.
"When the agreement runs out you can't continue to drive the car and you certainly can't give it to your mates. And that's what happened here."
When the case first landed in the Federal Court last July, the Police Integrity Commission settled out of court almost immediately.
It was quickly followed by the NSW Department of Corrective Services and the NSW Ombudsman's Office. But so far NSW Police have refused to blink.
"This is the first time in 30 years we've ever required a lawyer," Mr Craig said.
"I would estimate they have probably spent over $1 million in taxpayers' money so far in the legal system and all they have done is delay the inevitable."
Mr Speck says Micro Focus has "nobody to go to but the court".
"This is potentially a crime that has to be handled as a civil matter because everybody's got their hands dirty," he said.
"The victims can't go to police - it's the police who are doing the stealing."
This case has attracted surprisingly little attention so far.
Fresh lawsuit looms

But it is about to get even uglier. Micro Focus plans to launch yet another lawsuit, this time accusing the police of trying to replace the first batch of pirated software with another batch of pirated software which also belongs to Micro Focus.
The company claims this latest version of pirated software - a NetManage Applet - was provided by NSW Police to Corrective Services last year as they were scrambling to delete the ViewNow software.
But what Micro Focus now wants to know is how widely the pirated Applet is being used to run the COPS system.
"What's incredible is that they've gone to any length to try and avoid discovery of what's being used in there," Mr Craig said.
"They've been continually deleting our product, they need to replace it with something.
"And that they've replaced it with another license they have no right to use, its just astonishing. It's madness."
NSW Police have denied the latest allegations by Micro Focus, and have vowed to "vigorously defend" any future court action.
But Micro Focus says Police already face a bill of at least $10 million if they lose the case in lost earnings, legal costs and damages.
In a statement from NSW Police to 7.30, they said even if Micro Focus did have damages awarded to them, the $10 million figure did "not concur with the company's calculation of costs to the Force should [the] company be successful with its civil action".
NSW Police followed that statement with another that relates to the fresh accusation against them.
"NSW Police denies these fresh claims in relation to the NetManage Applet and will vigorously contest the matter," the statement said.

Typical fucking pigs, they will use any means to fuck over the the poor and any cunt who doesn't have more nor fame and when they get their bacon grilled, just like any rich fucker they throw their money at people to make it goes away!! I HOPE THAT MICRO FOCUS RAPES YOU FOR EVERY THING ROB JOHNSTON!! You hypercritical back stabbing cuntbag!

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#1287 Major Fuckup

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Posted 10 May 2012 - 11:00

http://news.ninemsn....-parked-up-tree

Quote

Unlicenced street racer Zbigniew Filo, 24, had enraged residents of Lubczyna for months by speeding around in his white Ford Escort, making noise and putting locals' lives at risk with his thrill-seeking antics, the Mirror reports.
A police spokesman said they received a call from a man who said his car was stuck in a tree and his neighbours had put it there.
"After inspecting the site we instructed him to remove it from the tree," he added.
No one has claimed responsibility for the prank but one villager said another man's mobile crane had been borrowed the night before the car was relocated.
A neighbour said he supported the vigilante justice because Mr Filo was a reckless driver and could have killed someone.
"Perhaps he'll think twice about his hair-raising driving and about getting a licence or who knows where his next car might end up?"
Mr Filo took said he got the message but added "it was a bit harsh".

Owned!

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#1288 Krieger22

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Posted 18 May 2012 - 10:39

http://www.reuters.c...E84F1HM20120517

I wonder who's in that video |8

Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1289 Chyros

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Posted 18 May 2012 - 11:13

View PostKrieger22, on 18 May 2012 - 10:39, said:

http://www.reuters.c...E84F1HM20120517

I wonder who's in that video |8
Des! GET BACK TO YOUR UNIT!
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The brave hide behind technology. The stupid hide from it. The clever have technology, and hide it.
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#1290 Krieger22

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 13:16

http://jalopnik.com/...tomotive-excess

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German Porsche Tuner Gemballa welcomed the next innovation in ridiculously expensive and hardly necessary automotive modifications this past week with the announcement they have engineered a process which will allow customers to coat the interior or exterior of their cars with genuine diamonds.
What. The. Fuck.
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Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1291 Chyros

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 13:50

View PostKrieger22, on 27 May 2012 - 13:16, said:

http://jalopnik.com/...tomotive-excess

Quote

German Porsche Tuner Gemballa welcomed the next innovation in ridiculously expensive and hardly necessary automotive modifications this past week with the announcement they have engineered a process which will allow customers to coat the interior or exterior of their cars with genuine diamonds.
What. The. Fuck.
Posted Image
Koenigsegg have been doing it for a while with the Trevita actually :xD: . Though there are only three of those, and they cost 5 million dollars apiece :lol: .
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#1292 Krieger22

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Posted 27 May 2012 - 14:03

View PostChyros, on 27 May 2012 - 13:50, said:

View PostKrieger22, on 27 May 2012 - 13:16, said:

http://jalopnik.com/...tomotive-excess

Quote

German Porsche Tuner Gemballa welcomed the next innovation in ridiculously expensive and hardly necessary automotive modifications this past week with the announcement they have engineered a process which will allow customers to coat the interior or exterior of their cars with genuine diamonds.
What. The. Fuck.
Posted Image
Koenigsegg have been doing it for a while with the Trevita actually :xD: . Though there are only three of those, and they cost 5 million dollars apiece :lol: .
Except that that's actually a finish of sorts for the carbon fibre, this is paint! :xD:

Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1293 Major Fuckup

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Posted 29 May 2012 - 12:14

View PostKrieger22, on 27 May 2012 - 14:03, said:

View PostChyros, on 27 May 2012 - 13:50, said:

View PostKrieger22, on 27 May 2012 - 13:16, said:

http://jalopnik.com/...tomotive-excess

Quote

German Porsche Tuner Gemballa welcomed the next innovation in ridiculously expensive and hardly necessary automotive modifications this past week with the announcement they have engineered a process which will allow customers to coat the interior or exterior of their cars with genuine diamonds.
What. The. Fuck.
Posted Image
Koenigsegg have been doing it for a while with the Trevita actually :xD: . Though there are only three of those, and they cost 5 million dollars apiece :lol: .
Except that that's actually a finish of sorts for the carbon fibre, this is paint! :xD:

Imagine the insurance quote if you wing one in a carpark and left your details under their windscreen wiper :xD;

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#1294 Major Fuckup

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 02:59

http://news.ninemsn....s-invades-india

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The residents of Sadiya, in Assam state, said they were celebrating a Hindu festival on the evening of May 8 when swarms of spiders suddenly appeared and attacked them, The Times of India reported.
Two people died over the next few days, including a man and a schoolboy, and many more turned up at the town's hospital after being bitten.
Authorities are considering fogging the town with insecticide DDT to kill the spiders and a team of life scientists has arrived in the town to identify the arachnids.
"As of now, we cannot give a specific name. It's similar to a tarantula but it could be a whole new species" Dr L R Saikia, head of the Department of Life Sciences at Dibrugarh University, said.
"But whatever the species, it is a highly aggressive spider. It leaps at anything that comes close."
Dr Saikia said it was "too early to declare it a killer spider" because its venom had not yet been tested for toxicity.
The superintendent of Sadiya Civil Hospital said it was not certain the deaths were due to the spiders' venom.
"It could have been an allergic reaction to the venom, which triggered cardiac arrest in both the victims," Dr Anil Phatowali said.
"But all the bite patients first went to witch doctors, who cut open their wounds with razors, drained out blood and burnt it. That could have also made them sick."

So deadly attacking spiders aye..... Sounds like 8 legged Freaks to me!

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#1295 Chyros

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Posted 04 June 2012 - 07:15

View PostMajor Fuckup, on 04 June 2012 - 02:59, said:

http://news.ninemsn....s-invades-india

Quote

The residents of Sadiya, in Assam state, said they were celebrating a Hindu festival on the evening of May 8 when swarms of spiders suddenly appeared and attacked them, The Times of India reported.
Two people died over the next few days, including a man and a schoolboy, and many more turned up at the town's hospital after being bitten.
Authorities are considering fogging the town with insecticide DDT to kill the spiders and a team of life scientists has arrived in the town to identify the arachnids.
"As of now, we cannot give a specific name. It's similar to a tarantula but it could be a whole new species" Dr L R Saikia, head of the Department of Life Sciences at Dibrugarh University, said.
"But whatever the species, it is a highly aggressive spider. It leaps at anything that comes close."
Dr Saikia said it was "too early to declare it a killer spider" because its venom had not yet been tested for toxicity.
The superintendent of Sadiya Civil Hospital said it was not certain the deaths were due to the spiders' venom.
"It could have been an allergic reaction to the venom, which triggered cardiac arrest in both the victims," Dr Anil Phatowali said.
"But all the bite patients first went to witch doctors, who cut open their wounds with razors, drained out blood and burnt it. That could have also made them sick."

So deadly attacking spiders aye..... Sounds like 8 legged Freaks to me!
Sounds like just another day in Oz to me, really :P . The DDT they used to wipe them will probably kill more than just the spiders though - that's why it was banned 40 years ago by everyone else :xD: .
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#1296 Krieger22

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Posted 06 June 2012 - 11:47

http://gizmodo.com/5...atorium-on-fire

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As you'll well know if you barbecue very often, fat is extremely flammable. Normally, the human body doesn't carry enough of the stuff for it to be a problem during cremation—but recently, an obese woman from Austria carried so much weight that her fat burnt strongly enough to set a crematorium ablaze.

Wait, what?

Edited by Krieger22, 06 June 2012 - 11:50.


Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1297 Major Fuckup

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Posted 06 June 2012 - 12:02

View PostKrieger22, on 06 June 2012 - 11:47, said:

http://gizmodo.com/5...atorium-on-fire

Quote

As you'll well know if you barbecue very often, fat is extremely flammable. Normally, the human body doesn't carry enough of the stuff for it to be a problem during cremation—but recently, an obese woman from Austria carried so much weight that her fat burnt strongly enough to set a crematorium ablaze.

Wait, what?

Well you learn something new every day!

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#1298 Krieger22

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Posted 15 June 2012 - 10:08

http://jalopnik.com/...ally-parked-car

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A business student with car trouble in central London learned an expensive lesson when his broken-down Ford Mondeo had its hatch opened via a controlled explosion, then ticketed, then towed.

Overkill much?

Sareen said:

NOOO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOO ...*closes ears* lalalala that never happened!


#1299 Chyros

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Posted 15 June 2012 - 10:56

View PostKrieger22, on 15 June 2012 - 10:08, said:

http://jalopnik.com/...ally-parked-car

Quote

A business student with car trouble in central London learned an expensive lesson when his broken-down Ford Mondeo had its hatch opened via a controlled explosion, then ticketed, then towed.

Overkill much?
Awwww, that's just harsh :xD: .
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The brave hide behind technology. The stupid hide from it. The clever have technology, and hide it.
—The Book of Cataclysm


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#1300 Major Fuckup

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Posted 16 June 2012 - 06:22

View PostChyros, on 15 June 2012 - 10:56, said:

View PostKrieger22, on 15 June 2012 - 10:08, said:

http://jalopnik.com/...ally-parked-car

Quote

A business student with car trouble in central London learned an expensive lesson when his broken-down Ford Mondeo had its hatch opened via a controlled explosion, then ticketed, then towed.

Overkill much?
Awwww, that's just harsh :xD: .

Its a Ford who cares!

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