229 replies to this topic

[Sgt. Nuker]

Chivalry in an unmolested state is what should happen, not this "sick and twisted engine of sex" you refer to. It's true some guys captialise on this because they know they'll get "in her pants", but that's not what it was meant for. In today's world, the pure things have been tainted and taken to levels there were never meant to go. I still believe in the purest form of chivalry.

50/50 is how things should be between a man and a woman. This is how a relationship should be. Often times though, it's more 10/90, where one gives more than they should and the other takes too much.

I do think we've gotten a bit off topic, so if we are to continue a more in-depth look in the direction we are taking this topic, I suggest a thread is opened up in the Deep End.


Regards,

Nuker

[Athena]

I wouldn't be disappointed. What matters to me is that I have a great day.

But then again, and I'll say it again, I'm not most people. I'm not "the average girl" and not "the average person". And I'm darn glad for it. If you're into "average people", suit yourself.

EDIT What Major Nuker said. 50/50.

Edited by Blaat85, 09 April 2007 - 15:14.

[spiderspag]

I am evidently not into the "average" person, as my rant quite clearly demonstrated

[Cryptkeeper]

ya agree social sterotypes is the death of true chivilry and all things good becuase then people think thats exactly going to have to happan this way or

else there a bad person it sickens me becuase matter fact people use people's stupidity in matter such as this to there advantage

this is why i want to go to the person who made structure for how to proceed when trying to become more then just friends and gun him or her down

not becuase it doesn't help but becuase if it weren't there people would realize every ones different and stop using it as stupid standerd of who is good and whos bad when infact alot people us it to there advantage and there the ones you have to look out for

Edited by cryptkeeper, 09 April 2007 - 19:00.

[CoLT]

Ok. I have to admit to all of you here and now, that I did have an alternate motive for starting this thread.
I liked this girl and I wanted to know if she felt the same or at the very least what she felt about me. I thought because this is a very widespread community, there would be a varied opinion on the topic and I would then be able to have a clearer idea.
It helped me a lot, people, thank you.

Today, approximately 20 minutes ago, I asked her out. I'm meeting her this Friday and she seemed reasonably enthusiastic about going. I will update on how this turns out.

Thank you all so much for your contributions.

Special thanks to:

Major Nuker
Blaat85
cryptkeeper
Dauth
E.V.E
Stinger
Warbz
Machairi
Overdose
Prophet of the Pimps
RI-Ravager
-------------------------------------------
All of you above this line have given me valuable help that have helped me in my understanding of the 'signs and signals'. I really appreciate it.
-------------------------------------------

...and SpiderSpag
You have taught me of what kind of situation I want to avoid in life. I seek companionship and friendship in life. I don't understand what has caused you to become the way you are now but I know that I do not want to end up in that situation. For this, I thank you.

CoLT

[Lord Atlantis]

I'm very happy for you ColT, you lucky guy. But I have yet to find sucess with this.

-Lord_Atlantis

[CoLT]

Well I'm not successful yet. She only said yes... We havent gone out yet. I'm hoping it works though.

[Lord Atlantis]

But still, its way farther than I've ever gone.

-Lord_Atlantis

[CoLT]

Well you have more posts than me, that's good enuff

On-topic:
If you like a chick, do what I did, look for the signs that maybe she likes you.

-OR-

Get to know her. Then, if she's single, ask her out.

Need to muster the courage to do this. I know I did, but I was kinda in overdrive, running on nerves and adrenalin as soon as I said the first line in a series of questions that led to asking her out. It was far from perfect but you need to rid yourself of fear of failing. That is what I think the first step is.

[spiderspag]

All the best man. And it isn't as if all my experiences have been bad... I've had several girls in my life, its just the bad apples you have to watch out for.

lol and I'm not sure what you mean by "the way I am now" but I can assure you that I'm probably not that bad in real life... I just enjoy a rant every now and again.

choice!

Edited by spiderspag, 11 April 2007 - 15:01.

[CoLT]

Oh ok.. I just got that vibe, you know? That maybe you were venting and not so much ranting, as such. I kinda figured that you were all "Women are too much trouble, stay away from them." kinda thing...

But, if you aren't like that, that's cool. I'm just grateful for your comments about the "bad apples" and I understand that. It's cool.

[Athena]

I'm glad I could be of some help . I hope things go well CoLT , good luck .

[Jazzie Spurs]

Yes, good luck CoLT and uses the....

[Whitey]

As one for REAL equality I will throw in my two cents.

Chivalry when it comes to a guy seeking a girl SHOULD be dead. I don't want to sound like some "wannabe pimp" but honestly, look at us now. Why should a guy do everything for a girl when said girl is no less than the guy? Back in the 1700s and whatnot, women didn't have all the rights and freedoms they do today so they did deserve the added chivalrous respect. But that was yesterday. Men are not above women in any way and should thus not look down on them, the chivalry role is doing just that. It is respect, sure, but in the wrong way.

Sure, open the door for them or grab them a chair, pick up their books, but don't go out of your way to do so! It looks arrogant in my eyes and I'm sure in many others'.

Show them mutual respect. You are not their knight in shining armor because they are not in danger anymore.

Edited by Machairi, 12 April 2007 - 02:00.

[Sgt. Nuker]

CoLT, I realize this is a bit late, but I wish you the best of luck. You hold up your end, and give her the best time out she's had in a while. If nothing else, she'll remember you for that. You do what you know is right, no one can fault you for that.

One more thing before I go. Pay attention to things she talks about. For instance, her likes, dislikes, favorites, dreams/goals. Girls like (and sometimes are impressed by) guys that remember and pick up things they mentioned to you. Pay attention to how she looks at certain things, and make a mental note. Another biggie is, if the subject ever comes up, remember the day of your first date, AND, most importantly, remember her birthday. Just some final tidbits that I remembered I didn't tell you. Anyway, I sincerely hope all went well, and you're more than welcome for the advice.


My best,

Nuker

[CoLT]

@Machairi: Thanks, I WAS trying to get at that in an earlier post about not being too nice.

Thanks, Nuker. That is some good advice. Can't say I've not heard that before but still it is no less important.

UPDATE

The date for this Friday (i.e. tomorrow by Western Australian time) has been postponed, sadly.
This is due to her parents having plans for this weekend. It appears they have a beach house and (because it's the weekend) they are going up there for 3 days, starting this Friday.
She told me in a txt message today.

The exact words are:
"Hay my parents decided i gotta go to my beach house for 3 nights so i cant ay sorry next week maybe yeh xx"

And yes, she is Australian. This explains the various euphemisms seen in the message.

Just wondering if there's something I might be missing in this message. I'm not expecting that there is something hidden in there but I just want to check. To me, it seems fairly ordinary but my suspicious side is acting up over this (as it usually does) and I just can't help but think... things. So anyone, feel free to analyse this and post your thoughts.

P.S. I support the idea raised a while back about a thread on this subject being created in the Deep End. It's where I originally created this thread but it was moved out here and maybe now it's gotten serious enough to be moved back in.





EDIT: @Kid, What do you mean by "Yes, good luck CoLT and uses the...."

Edited by CoLT, 12 April 2007 - 16:11.

[Cryptkeeper]

ok i've been talking to this girl online on myspace it seems like she can read my mind and we realy similiar is this a good thing XD she lives near me about 11 minutes away its kinda crazy XD

becuase i was randomlty search for people nere me and found a fellow naruto fan XD decided to message her and invite to my friends list but now after lots of messages probly about 20+ lol its scary how similiar she is XD

and now i'am realy nervous baout meeting her even tho we haven't even scheduled one yet XD i'am just going to meet her as a friend tho but i think i'am begining to like her XD

[Sgt. Nuker]

What sort of "things" came into your mind when you read the text message? The fact that she just text'd you alone could mean something, but in all actuality, it could just be nothing more than a simple message. \

Me personally, I'd think about it, but then again, I tend to do that anyway, so don't use that as a guage. Just when she gets back, try and make small talk about how her weekend went.

Do yourself a favor though and don't worry about it. If though, she makes a habit of getting out of you and her meeting, that could mean she wants you to mean nothing more than just a friend.


Regards,

Nuker

[CoLT]

That's really cool, cryptkeeper. Hope it goes well for you.

Nuker, you hit the nail on the head right there. I did think she was trying to get out of it all but that's just my insecure, suspicious side acting up. I'll call her up next week on tuesday morning, it'll be the morning after she gets back, I think and I'll arrange something for next week.

[Alias]

Also, Remember to be yourself. Do not try to be someone you are not. If they don't like you acting yourself, then they obviously aren't the right match for you.

[Cryptkeeper]

we finaly meet and we talked for 3 hours it was like we were almost the same lol laughing constantly at are selves and at each other lol

i'am still shocked and now i realy don't know where to go from here lol i gues it work out some how lol things allways do in the end

i don't know if she likes me but even if she doesn't she is now one of my best friends

oh sorry colt thx i wish you luck to becuase i get susipious to and jealous XD stupid paranoia

Edited by cryptkeeper, 13 April 2007 - 04:17.

[CoLT]

Yeah it's wierd how paranoid people can sometimes be, huh?

cryptkeeper, that sounds really cool. Sounds like it's working out really nicely for you, great!

[Sgt. Nuker]

Best wishes to you mate when the girl you were supposed to go out with comes back. Just when you talk to her (and you probably know this), but try not to have a negative tone in your voice. Best thing to do is act like it didn't phase you, and show that you're still very interested in her. Doing that should help you realize if she feels the same way or not.


My best,

Nuker

[CoLT]

Thanks, Nuker.

[LCPL Carrow]

CoLT, on 12 Apr 2007, 12:08, said:

The exact words are:
"Hay my parents decided i gotta go to my beach house for 3 nights so i cant ay sorry next week maybe yeh xx"

Emphasis added.

That 'xx' bit is interesting, I do believe that she is definitely interested in you, mate. I don't really think there is any hidden message behind what she said. Not being Aussie I dunno what 'yeh' means to y'all, but when a girl puts 'xx' or'xoxo' in a message - no matter where she's from - that's a pretty good indicator that she likes you. Usually.

Dont worry about her trying to get out of it, it's only happened once. If it happens again, though...

@ Chivalry: I am almost exactly like Ri-Ravager. Dude, rock on.